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Last day of school, stock

I need to get out of here... 

Break

As school principal,

I sometimes police litter,

adjust loud music

and act as a babysitter.

***

The loud music I describe

was on school’s first day,

and then practically daily

clear through the month of May.

***

The perpetrator purchased

a new car last summer,

then cranked his tunes near my office,

can’t get much dumber.

***

Another one is graffiti

in the bathroom stalls.

Words written about me

in permanent marker scrawls.

***

Broken vending machines

from being shaken too hard

and the unauthorized use

of my library card.

***

Then arguments, quarrels,

squabbling and bickering.

As I broke these up

others just sat back snickering.

***

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This year I ended betting

on professional sports

and sent home to change

a fellow dressed in cut-off shorts.

***

Unexcused absences

are always a great concern,

followed by vague doctor notes.

When will they ever learn?

***

Then there’s stolen sack lunches

and strange stains on the rug,

plus the harassment case

of the ponytail tug.

***

It’s been a long year

and now that the end is in sight,

I erred in thinking

that it brought the end of my plight.

***

The last-day-of-school rally

was held in the gym.

When right below my seat,

I heard her, giggling at him.

***

I rooted those two out

hiding beneath the bleachers.

Oh, how I need a summer break…

from all these teachers!

***

Dominic "Flominic" Farrenkopf

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